3 Reasons Why We Don’t Give Our Kids An Allowance For Chores

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A child putting a nickle into a piggy bank

We Don’t Give Our Kids An Allowance For Chores:

Our kids are expected to do chores almost every day, but we do not give them an allowance for chores.

But before anyone starts freaking out, let me say my husband and I are not anti-allowance. Nor do we think that parents who give their kids an allowance for chores are horrible people. Allowances can be a great tool for parents to teach their children about money management. Just not one we choose to use.

Secondly, we are not pro handing kids a bunch of chores we don’t want to do ourselves. Our kids don’t have a huge list of chores they must complete before we feed them dinner. We have 1 or 2 jobs that we ask them to do randomly throughout the day, or when they come to us to tell us how bored they are (which they caught on to pretty quick, and now rarely tell us they are bored. I think they call that a parenting win! #winning).

3 reasons why we don't give our kids an allowance for chores, how we reward for chores, and how we teach money management to our kids. #Allowances #NoAllowances #Chores #RewardSystem #MoneyManagement #TeachingMoneyManagement #DaveRamsey #ThoughtsOnAllowances

Why We Don’t Give Our Kids An Allowance For Chores:

  1. Everyone Works Together To Run The Household
  2. Don’t Want Money To Be The Only Motivation
  3. Life Lesson: Sometimes You Do Things Becuase They Have To Be Done, Not Becuase You’re Getting Paid

The reason we choose not to give our kids an allowance to do their everyday chores is simply that we believe that part of being a family means that everyone works together to run the household.  Expected chores help teach kids responsibility, respect for the things they have, and life skills. We also don’t want these essential lessons to be motivated by money. The simple fact is when they start a house of their own no one is going to be there to pay them to empty their dishwasher, put away their laundry, or feed their dog. Sometimes in life, you have to do things just because they need to get done, not because someone will pay you to do them.

We are not even close to parenting experts by any standards. But we are seeing the fruit of this strategy in our older kids now. Sometimes they will just clean their room, or put away their laundry simply because they saw it had to be done. They have even started doing things around the house that we have never asked them to do, like loading the dishwasher. And I suck it up and let them load the dishwasher wrong because that’s what people tell me good parents do.

Some Awesome Chore Charts:

This is my disclosure statement

How We Teach Money Management Instead:

‘So, if you’re not giving your kids an allowance for chores, how do you teach them money management?’

We get this question all the time, and rightfully so. It’s a good question. Money management is an important life skill. I’d argue that the skill of properly managing money is more important than any chore kids learn to do. But just because we don’t pay our kids an allowance for chores, doesn’t mean we don’t pay our kids for anything.

There are special out of the ordinary chores that our kids can do to earn some extra cash, too. Vacuuming out the car would be an example of this. And, to be honest, it’s something that needs to be done all the time. Sometimes we just hand them some cash as a reward because they are going above and beyond expectations.

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Rewards For Chores That Are Not Money:

While Mike and I believe we are teaching a valuable life lesson by not giving our kids an allowance for chores, at the end of the day our kids are just kids. And it’s not fair for kids to be slammed with harsh life realities. We are not into the whole; ‘Life’s not fair. Do all these chores because life’s not fair’ parenting style. So we reward our kids with other treats. Like I said above, sometimes we just simply had them some random amount of cash randomly. The exact amount is a surprise for everyone because I rarely know how much cash is in my wallet. Sometimes we get them the thing they have talking about. Maybe we will take them out shopping so they can pick out their own reward.

And that pretty much sums up how our family deals with the whole issue of allowance. It’s what works for our family. At least, for now. I’m curious though, does your family practice giving allowances for chores? Did you get allowances for chores as a kid? Let me know in the comments below!

 

9 comments

  1. Gina Butler says:

    I received an allowance as a child. I started out doing so for my daughter, but somewhere down the line, I stopped.

    I think teaching money management is much more important than just being paid for chores. I mean no one pays me to do the chores in the house. lol

  2. kristen visser says:

    I never got an allowance for doing work around the house. it was just something that we all worked together to do. and i will do the same with my girls. my husband and i are very good with getting them the things that they need or something they ask for IF they deserve it but will not be giving any money to help around the house

  3. Tairalyn Ciulla says:

    We were just talking about money management this morning when Sofia asked WHY daddy had to go to work. To my reply, do you want breakfast? Explaining how EVERYTHING cost money. Going on to explain why she is going to school. So that we hope one day she will find a passion she can turn into a job and everyday she can live happily!

  4. Heydy says:

    So much yes to this post! I don’t give my son allowance for helping with chores but with that being said I am mindful with what I do give him and rewarding him in different ways. Sometimes not just about money!

  5. Rachel Johnson says:

    We give our 9 year old $5/week flat. Then he has a set of chores, small things like showering or tidying his room. If he does his small chore everyday before 8pm he gets an extra $5 for that week. Also if he didnt do his chore yesterday then the next day he gets no screen time till he’s done the previous chore. I know it sounds a bit complicated but at the beginning of this school year we sat down and had a 15 min talk about personal responsibilities, chores and privileges vs needs and this is what we came up with. Guess we’ll see how it goes 🙂

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